[Felvtalk] Tucker

Thu Jun 9 08:50:19 CDT 2016

I picked up Tucker’s ashes yesterday. I was really worried as I didn’t know
if it would make me feel better or worse. I haven’t eaten since Sunday my
appetite is nonexistent, I have managed to choke down a couple protein
shakes. My eyes are so swollen, I feel bad for anyone who has the
misfortune of looking at me, or being around me for that matter. Well, I of
course cried all of the way to the vets, and all the way home. But then I
curled up in bed with my little box of Tucker, and I actually did feel a
little more at peace. I laid there with him and went through my pictures
again and talked to him about all of my feelings and my love for him, about
our memories and how much I miss him.

I have actually been in touch with a rescue group I found on pet finder,
they test every cat for FELV/FIV while many others don’t. I know that there
is no sure thing with testing, and I wouldn’t trade my time with Tucker for
anything in the world. I just know that emotionally and financially I am
not ready for FELV again right now. If it happens, just like with any
illness, then I deal with it, because that is what you do.  I am going to
Petsmart over in Tampa on Sunday to meet their kitties, I have no idea if I
will be ready, or if this is what I desperately need to do to help me heal,
but it won’t hurt to go meet them and see how my heart feels. One of the
greatest gifts Tucker gave me is that “no cats” Harry, when I showed him a
pictures of a kitty on Pet finder he said  “Is that the one you want to
get?” So I know now that I will never again have to live without the feel
of that soft fur on my face or the heart melting sound of purring in my
ear. It is so hard because I am scared to get one, and I am scared not to.
I guess we will see what happens…

*From:* Felvtalk [mailto:felvtalk-bounces at felineleukemia.org] *On Behalf Of
*Ardy Robertson
*Sent:* Wednesday, June 08, 2016 11:59 PM
*To:* felvtalk at felineleukemia.org
*Subject:* Re: [Felvtalk] Tucker

I’m just so happy that you had that kind of relationship with your
fur-baby. The memories are wonderful. I recently adopted another cat even
though I said I would not. No one will ever take Tigger’s place in my
heart, but Topaz is easing the pain. I may never have that bond that I had
with Tigger or like you had with Tucker, but I figured that was not a
reason to not try again, and with all the little homeless kitties, I think
Tigger would have wanted me to help another kitty. Certainly take your
time, but I hope you can open your heart again at some point.

Ardy

*From:* Felvtalk [mailto:felvtalk-bounces at felineleukemia.org
<felvtalk-bounces at felineleukemia.org>] *On Behalf Of *Rachel Dagner
*Sent:* Wednesday, June 8, 2016 7:22 AM
*To:* felvtalk at felineleukemia.org
*Subject:* Re: [Felvtalk] Tucker

Thank you everyone for your kind replies. I knew it was going to be hard
for me, it has been even harder than I ever imagined. I went through all of
my adorable pictures of him last night. Remembered him how he was and
imagined him that way again. He was such a cool and handsome little guy. I
only had him for a year and a half. In that time we went through so much.
Emergency vet visits, surgeries, worry. I wouldn't change it for the world
though. He touched my life and heart so much. I opted for a private
cremation, so I can keep him close to me always. I was the one person in
his life that he loved and adored more than anything, and he never doubted
my love for him.

Sent from my iPhone

On Jun 8, 2016, at 8:02 AM, Katherine K. <kathstix at gmail.com> wrote:

I'm sorry about Tucker and for the pain you feel. I hope the happy memories
you shared bring you comfort during this difficult time. We're here for
you.

On Wed, Jun 8, 2016 at 1:37 AM, Ardy Robertson <ardyr at centurytel.net> wrote:

I'm so sorry for your loss of Tucker.

Ardy

-----Original Message-----
From: Felvtalk [mailto:felvtalk-bounces at felineleukemia.org] On Behalf Of
Rachel Dagner
Sent: Tuesday, June 7, 2016 9:33 AM
To: felvtalk at felineleukemia.org
Subject: [Felvtalk] Tucker

I lost him yesterday morning. He was having a really hard time breathing due
to the tumor in his chest. It was time, they got me in right away. It was so
very hard to say goodbye. I haven't been able to quit crying since.
It's so unbelievably hard, even knowing that it would happen soon. I miss
him so much. Everything reminds me of him. I am at work luckily alone today,
and can't quit crying. I had him with me at work last week and he was laying
on my desk and purring and sleeping. It's just so hard to believe he is
gone. I sat in the parking lot at my vets for at least an hour with my car
door open, just in case he spirit needed to get inside and come home with
me. I know it will get better, but right now the pain is just unbearable. I
know that those here who have gone through this understand where I am right
now.

_______________________________________________
Felvtalk mailing list
Felvtalk at felineleukemia.org
http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org

_______________________________________________
Felvtalk mailing list
Felvtalk at felineleukemia.org
http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org

_______________________________________________
Felvtalk mailing list
Felvtalk at felineleukemia.org
http://felineleukemia.org/mailman/listinfo/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org
-------------- next part --------------
An HTML attachment was scrubbed...
URL: <http://felineleukemia.org/pipermail/felvtalk_felineleukemia.org/attachments/20160609/36b015a8/attachment.html>